When last we left our valiant heroes, they had plunged after their comrade, Talon Darkwater, into a magical vortex that took them to the plane of Pandemonium, ostensibly to rescue Talon’s soul, which as a youth he had gambled away to the were/dire tiefling blademaster known as Verthengetorix Jones. Alas they were all spat back into the Prime Material plane, save Talon, whom they fear they shall never see again. Distraught, the Blue Hand Group splintered, with Buck retreating to the
Torffin – Strangers from distant lands, friends of old you have been summoned here to answer the threat of the Caves of Chaos. The borderlands stand upon the brink of destruction, none can escape it. You will unite or you will fall. We are all bound to this one fate, this one doom.
Gunther – Woah, Torffin, lay off the wacky tabacky, eh? I know you elves are “lovers of nature,” but c’mon, it sounds like you’ve spent more time puffin’ magic dragons than fighting them. The Caves of Chaos are emptied! Dwarves mine them, kobolds have been integrated into my great society as a labor class, and the bree-yark of hobgoblins is heard only ironically.
Jarl – My new friends… You do not know me, but I come with a great message. I know an evil will beset the Borderlands and fracture the peace that you have labored so greatly to establish.
Ragnar – (to himself) Filthy beasts and vermin. They think that Ragnar is their friend? Ragnar has no friends. Ragnar killed all of his friends. Ragnar had the flesh flayed from his father’s bones!
Buck – Jarl, we Halfling druids are a dangerous breed: half in love with death, living life on the knife’s edge. I am sworn avenger of the woodland realm, protector of the
Gunther – Yes, Buck is indeed a terror. You could call him a force of nature. I call him friend. For too long have I tended to the workings of the Keep, when I should have been striding the paths of nature with my old companions. I have become what I hate the most – a bureaucrat! My character sheet says I’m chaotic good, but my life has become…lawful neutral!
Jarl – Speak not so ill of yourself! Under your leadership this keep’s reputation has spread across the greater Northern continent. I came here after learning of an ancient tale…
Buck – An ancient tale?
Jarl – An ancient tale that foretells this Keep’s place in history. Should the evil that will befall it prevail, it will cover all the lands in darkness. Should good triumph, then this Keep will become the center of a great empire. But this evil ---
Torffin – This evil cannot be concealed by the power of the Elves. We do not have the strength to withstand both Pandemonium and Isengard. Gandalf, the Ring cannot stay here. This evil belongs to all of the Borderlands. They must decide now how to end it. The time of the Elves is over, my people are leaving these shores. Who will you look to when we've gone? The Dwarves? They toil away in caverns, seeking riches. They care nothing for the troubles of others.
Ragnar – (drooling over a piece of raw (presumably animal) flesh) True.
Buck – Too long have I been away. The forest spirit, the Hamadryad of all Wilderness Lore, has bewitched my senses and ensnared my soul. There is more to life than the flitter of a moon moth’s wings, the gurgle of the mountain stream, and the elegant parade of a herd of elk. There is life beyond the forest’s edge! And I mean to protect that life, though it means my blood will stain the earth.
Ragnar – (still drooling) That can be arranged, foolish peck!
Jarl – You know, I wish you’d let me speak instead of just going off on these ridiculous monologues. And then this crazy dwarf guy whispers how he’s gonna kill you all in your sleep. I mean, no offense here, but --
Torffin – Darkness has crept back into the forests of the world. Rumor has grown of a shadow in the East, whispers of a nameless fear, and this nameless evil has perceived. Its time had now come.
Gunther – You know what, I’m through being the castellan. I thought it would be all about fun and combat and sticking it to the man. But I’ve become the man! And I don’t even have a stick anymore.
Buck – Hrm. I wonder if I can do a rebuild like in the Players Handbook II to get the shapeshift ability. I mean no one ever spontaneously casts summon nature’s ally. I wonder if I can convince the DM that I’ve been on a quest for the last year, so I can just retcon that ability into my persona. Hmmmmm….
Jarl – By the stars in Pelor’s belt! Listen to me! I summoned you all hear to tell you about the threat to your Keep. And if we defeat it, I believe we’ll be able to find out how to rescue your friend Talon and his lost soul. And stop making all these meta-gaming references! There’s no place for that in a serious quest.
Ragnar – (musically) Talon’s soul suffering eternal torment/Ragnar laughs at the pain of his comrades/Ragnar has but one true love/Sweet lady violence is her name…
Torffin – Well, here's one dwarf our enemies won't ensnare so easily. He has the eyes of a hawk and the ears of a fox.
Gunther – I mean, sure I love Nyssa. And I’m happy that she’s pregnant with our seventh child. It’s just… sometimes I feel like I’m advancing age categories and instead of gaining +1 to my mental abilities, I’m just getting screwed on my mortgage.
Jarl – The invaders---
Gunther – Come, friends tis not too late to seek a different end! It’s time to kick some serious posterior. I’m gonna rapid shot and not mark off the arrows I spend. Bwa ha ha ha!
Buck – Blue Handers – assemble! It is time for the disparate fingers of Buck’s Blue Hand Group to coil into an azure fist, and strike out at whatever chthonic creatures threaten us. Now for wrath, now for ruin, and the blue sun rising! Forth Buck’s Blue Hand-erlingas!
Jarl – Look, the Borderlands is under siege. There’s this evil force in Pandemonium. You won’t believe the monsters that she will unleash. Her name is Gorgotha. She means to consume you all!
Ragnar – Does she want me to (rolls dice) serve her?
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